Jack Lovejoy
Well-Known Member
Hey guys, it is Jack here, and let's review a game that has been requested by GunGunW, and thank you GunGun for suggesting this game for me to review.
Let's dive into this game that people call underrated. Well the first thing I see in this game is that WHY ARE THE CUTSCENES SO F##KING BRIGHT AND GARISH!? I mean seriously, is the sun that close to Sonic's world? I am surprised that they are not frying up like bacon and eggs. Well anyway, to the real part of the game, the graphics are not as bright as the cutscenes have and it is absolutely gorgeous in colors and it is like the 2d genesis games being slapped onto a 3d world. Now let's talk about the gameplay.
In this game, you play as Sonic, Tails, and Knuckles
[Jack]: Yes, just what I needed! A game that only revolves around the 3 characters I actually give a s##t about! (Accidentally drops the case and sees the back side of the game)
[Jack]: Wait a minute... I HAVE TO PLAY AS AMY, BIG, CHARMY, AND WHAT THE F##K IS THAT ROBOT?!?! DID GAMMA GET F##KING GAINS!?!
I am being serious here, you have to play as the characters nobody even cares about. But playing as Big or Charmy is unacceptable! *sigh* well anyway, the game here focuses on teamwork obviously and you have to play as 4 teams: Team Sonic, Team Rose, Team Chaotix, and Team Dark. For each of the teams, it ranges from difficulty, with Team Rose being easy, Team Sonic being Normal, Team Dark being Hard, and Team Chaotix.... being like minigames extended for a long goddamn time.
For the levels, they are marvelously crafted in many ways that lets you get to the goal in many different ways. However, let's talk about the controls... the thing that killed the overall experience. The controls are just plain bad here as the characters seem to accelerate uncontrollably as I move forward. I know for the adventure games, they went smoothly with good acceleration like back in the genesis days. However, somebody thought that sonic was not fast enough and they instead made him run like a crazy dog with rabies. Due to this, I find the controls very slippery and I found myself to be falling off into bottomless pits a lot.
The voice-acting here is kinda horrible too like in Sonic 06, but the thing is that the characters won't shut up in this game
[Tails]: I am falling!
[Knuckles]: Leave it to me Sonic
[Charmy]: Sea, Sea, Sea!
[Big]: Hey, where's my team?
[Jack]: SHUT THE F##K UP ALL OF YOU!!!!!
Anyway, the enemies have health bars and you need to take them out with multiple shots. I know this game is supposed to be a fast paced platformer but why would you need to make the enemies have health bars? In some areas of the game, you have to fight a certain number enemies to progress onto the next part of the level. But come on, that is what a beat-up should have, not a fast platformer. The thing about some of the enemies is that they take forever to kill, something that makes this game slowed down in pace. Oh, and did I mention that Team Sonic and Team Dark's stages take about 9 F##KING MINUTES ON AVERAGE? I am not joking ,these stages take too long to complete and it feels very tiresome and tedious. The best one to play in is team rose since they only take about 3 minutes to complete.
Sonic Heroes also has you to collect these keys that you need to get into special stages to get Chaos emeralds. About the special stages, THEY ARE JUST SO GODDAMN HORRENDOUS!! You travel in a pipe to collect orbs in order to chase after the chaos emerald, but the controls are just so slippery and the camera can't keep up with you since you are moving so fast. Also since the camera is falling behind, you cant see whether you land in an obstacle that slows you down exponentially. Do you want to get that emerald, yeah good luck with that, it took me like 7 f##king hours to get all the emeralds in one storyline! Doing these special stages is like riding on a mentally disabled horse in a race while blindfolding it.
[Jack]: Yes! I finally beat Sonic's storyline with all chaos emeralds! Now to move onto Team Rose and..... what? I have to collect the seven chaos emeralds in Team Rose's storyline too?! (Pulls out a gun to his forehead while crying)
Yes, they actually want you to replay these stages! Even though they have varied difficulty, it more or less feels the same as you go through the same stages blandly! What kind of a monster would bring this onto us!?!
{54 hours later}
Hey everyone, it is Jack here and I did not sleep for about 2 days, but I finally got all the stories completed with all chaos emeralds, let's get to the final story. In the final story, you got the longest transformation sequence in the world!
Anyway, I hate to hate this game, but this game gets a 5.2/10.
(Everyone boos at Jack)
[Jack]: I am sorry! It is just too many things bad about this game, like the forced replay and the constant change of pace and slippery controls that don't remedy the excellent level design and the beautiful graphics.
Please don't hate me! D:
Let's dive into this game that people call underrated. Well the first thing I see in this game is that WHY ARE THE CUTSCENES SO F##KING BRIGHT AND GARISH!? I mean seriously, is the sun that close to Sonic's world? I am surprised that they are not frying up like bacon and eggs. Well anyway, to the real part of the game, the graphics are not as bright as the cutscenes have and it is absolutely gorgeous in colors and it is like the 2d genesis games being slapped onto a 3d world. Now let's talk about the gameplay.
In this game, you play as Sonic, Tails, and Knuckles
[Jack]: Yes, just what I needed! A game that only revolves around the 3 characters I actually give a s##t about! (Accidentally drops the case and sees the back side of the game)
[Jack]: Wait a minute... I HAVE TO PLAY AS AMY, BIG, CHARMY, AND WHAT THE F##K IS THAT ROBOT?!?! DID GAMMA GET F##KING GAINS!?!
I am being serious here, you have to play as the characters nobody even cares about. But playing as Big or Charmy is unacceptable! *sigh* well anyway, the game here focuses on teamwork obviously and you have to play as 4 teams: Team Sonic, Team Rose, Team Chaotix, and Team Dark. For each of the teams, it ranges from difficulty, with Team Rose being easy, Team Sonic being Normal, Team Dark being Hard, and Team Chaotix.... being like minigames extended for a long goddamn time.
For the levels, they are marvelously crafted in many ways that lets you get to the goal in many different ways. However, let's talk about the controls... the thing that killed the overall experience. The controls are just plain bad here as the characters seem to accelerate uncontrollably as I move forward. I know for the adventure games, they went smoothly with good acceleration like back in the genesis days. However, somebody thought that sonic was not fast enough and they instead made him run like a crazy dog with rabies. Due to this, I find the controls very slippery and I found myself to be falling off into bottomless pits a lot.
The voice-acting here is kinda horrible too like in Sonic 06, but the thing is that the characters won't shut up in this game
[Tails]: I am falling!
[Knuckles]: Leave it to me Sonic
[Charmy]: Sea, Sea, Sea!
[Big]: Hey, where's my team?
[Jack]: SHUT THE F##K UP ALL OF YOU!!!!!
Anyway, the enemies have health bars and you need to take them out with multiple shots. I know this game is supposed to be a fast paced platformer but why would you need to make the enemies have health bars? In some areas of the game, you have to fight a certain number enemies to progress onto the next part of the level. But come on, that is what a beat-up should have, not a fast platformer. The thing about some of the enemies is that they take forever to kill, something that makes this game slowed down in pace. Oh, and did I mention that Team Sonic and Team Dark's stages take about 9 F##KING MINUTES ON AVERAGE? I am not joking ,these stages take too long to complete and it feels very tiresome and tedious. The best one to play in is team rose since they only take about 3 minutes to complete.
Sonic Heroes also has you to collect these keys that you need to get into special stages to get Chaos emeralds. About the special stages, THEY ARE JUST SO GODDAMN HORRENDOUS!! You travel in a pipe to collect orbs in order to chase after the chaos emerald, but the controls are just so slippery and the camera can't keep up with you since you are moving so fast. Also since the camera is falling behind, you cant see whether you land in an obstacle that slows you down exponentially. Do you want to get that emerald, yeah good luck with that, it took me like 7 f##king hours to get all the emeralds in one storyline! Doing these special stages is like riding on a mentally disabled horse in a race while blindfolding it.
[Jack]: Yes! I finally beat Sonic's storyline with all chaos emeralds! Now to move onto Team Rose and..... what? I have to collect the seven chaos emeralds in Team Rose's storyline too?! (Pulls out a gun to his forehead while crying)
Yes, they actually want you to replay these stages! Even though they have varied difficulty, it more or less feels the same as you go through the same stages blandly! What kind of a monster would bring this onto us!?!
{54 hours later}
Hey everyone, it is Jack here and I did not sleep for about 2 days, but I finally got all the stories completed with all chaos emeralds, let's get to the final story. In the final story, you got the longest transformation sequence in the world!
Anyway, I hate to hate this game, but this game gets a 5.2/10.
(Everyone boos at Jack)
[Jack]: I am sorry! It is just too many things bad about this game, like the forced replay and the constant change of pace and slippery controls that don't remedy the excellent level design and the beautiful graphics.
Please don't hate me! D:
that was a blast. I think that the health bars were out of place too, I have your back on that one. However, the enemies usually weren't too hard and they gave the game more depth. Even with as huge as the worlds were, we were playing as Sonic.... the fastest thing on Archie Comic's earth 
