Venting time

[Shane]

I have talked to a psychologist and found out some things about myself. I have a really off the charts IQ, yet bad schizophrenia which causes me to have the real world skills and common sense of a child. I have been told that if I didn't have schizophrenia, I would be a prodigy, and yet as an example of just how bad my schizophrenia is, I could not find the trash can at McDonald's the other day.

Everything is a mess for me. Either I am too smart or too dumb for it. The doctor thought it best to put me on more medicine and max it out to get my life back, but the extra medicine made me deathly ill so I had to go back to my normal dose.

I pretty much cry myself to sleep every night, but there is not much anyone can do for me without taking away the thing which I love and value most in my life - my independence. You touch my independence and I'm dead, because I will pull the plug on myself.

 

[Segata]

Forget IQ. It doesn't actually exist. Don't get caught up in it. Intelligence can't actually be measured. Been saying it since 1994 and well 4 years ago http://www.digitaltrends.com/cool-tech/now-scientists-want-to-tell-you-that-iq-doesnt-exist/

I say this because people esp with mental illness similar to both of ours can get emotionally caught up in how we measure.
Don't let others measure you for you. Take a piece of paper with a ruler make a 2 inch by 2 inch square. Write the names of the people that you trust and matter in your life. Anyone who's name not in that box. Don't matter what they think about you. World becomes easier to cope with when you live in a small world you have control over.